merely talk

Before I get in to another narcissistic ramble, I thought I'd do a little charity information session. Like pretty much everyone in the world I've been absolutely horrified about what's going on in South East Asia right now. And instead of saying how awful it is and then going on my way, I thought I'd donate some money to one of the many charities collecting to help those in desperate need of help.

Here is a listing of Canadian charities that are accepting donations. It's alright if you don't have much. The Red Cross only requires a minimum of $5. If I can donate so can you.

Start of the New Year in a good way. Improve your karma!

Now on to the selfishness!
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2004 was an interesting year for me. I would never have predicted this time last year that I'd be where I am now.

Instead of giving a blow by blow account of everything I did this year, which I think would be pretty boring (especially for me) I thought I'd just go over things that I learned this year.

1) Concerning working:

Working full time all the time is hard. I don't think I'm meant to do it. If only because I don't handle the increased stress well. And that makes me an unpleasant person who is constantly lashing out and blaming others.

At the same time I love working full time at my job. I don't know what I'd do with myself if I wasn't working, and I'd hate to see any of my kids less than I do now. When I'm at work I'm pleasant and goofy and happy. It's only after I leave that everything comes crashing down on me.

2) Concerning my accommodation:

I'm much better at living by myself than I ever thought I'd be. I was worried before I moved here that without roommates I'd be lonely. And I was a little. But between my friends and family I'm barely ever alone in this place. So much so that the few nights a week I do have on my own I appreciate. They give me the time I need to relax and unwind and do the things I really enjoy without having to worry about other people. For example if I want to watch a cheesy television show or listen to music of a questionable (taste wise) nature I can do it. No one telling me how stupid what I'm watching is. Or how awful what I'm listening to is. It's awesome.

3) Concerning Relationships:

Both platonic and romantic. I always knew everything was complicated and hard. And that in the end communication in anything is really the most important thing. Above trust, respect and love even. Without communicating properly you can't have any of those things. I've had a few rough patches with relationships this year which really proved it to me. Friendships have gone a bit awry and a romance go kaput. All because of misunderstandings and miscommunications. But like everything they were learning experiences and though hard, I think they've made me a better person.


In high school I hated my job. I was working as a cashier at Safeway and I felt that my soul was slowly being sucked away. Every time I walked to work I had a little mantra I would say to myself. To help me get through it. "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger." As my life has gone on past Safeway and on to even more difficult jobs and harder school, and bills and a greater independence, that has become my life mantra. So as I bid adieu to 2004 and am somewhat afraid (but excited as well) about what 2005 will bring, I have to remind myself that I can handle this life and it's adventures.

So bring it on.


Happy New Year everyone!